Positively Beaming Blog
Deep down we just want to belong.
To do that we need to fit in, be like everybody else.
I have never felt like everybody else.
Maybe it’s the same for you.
I always wanted to have a pony tail that swung from side to side when I walked, or one that could be flung around when I danced.
I wanted a suburban life where I took the kids to school and then did fitness with the other school mums returning to tend to my stylish home
or screeeeeech …. Stop ….…
“I love your hair,” drawled Pricilla from Texas. “Sooo great you have embraced your grey.”
This was not the first time I have been congratulated for going grey. Embracing our natural ‘sparkles’ is quite the thing at the moment and to grow-out the dye we’ve been using every four weeks.
But here’s the thing.
The shameful, inauthentic, embarrassing thing.
This grey is no more real than the deep brown before it or the gothic black of my 20’s. It is 1000% man made – bleached and toned every few w…
The one thing I could do all day, every day, is to listen to people tell their stories. To sit on my coaching couch and talk to clever women about their successes, their fears, their joy and the places at which they get stuck. Most clients will go through the motions with me but the clients I could spend all day with are the ones who are prepared to go all-in, get uncomfortable, receive feedback, question it in their own head, fight it and push through to a new solution.
I love it when it g…
I have been thinking a lot about resilience again lately. It's something that has fascinated me since I crashed and burned in my first career. Now that the universe has stirred up a tsunami of challenging events, I have been watching carefully again.
Our brain is hard-wired to make us safe. Our brain is velcro for the bad stuff and Teflon for the good. In evolutionary terms, there was no point noticing a beautiful flower when you were about to be eaten by a tiger. Sadly that same pre-historic a…
A wise person once told me that feedback is a treasure hunt not a witch hunt. The idea is to look for the gold and if there is not much then to look for the lesson and what can be learned.
But most of us would rather have root canal surgery than give or receive corrective feedback and so we miss the treasure that someone might be handing us.
1. Stop Your First Reaction
At the first sign of critical feedback, before you do anything—stop. Really. Try not to react at all! You’ll have at least on…
At my local park where I walk my dog, they also host junior hockey on the weekends. As I was waiting for Albert to sniff every tree and goal post I watched families arrive for what must have been an under 10 mixed-gender match. It was cold and windy and I am thinking kudos to parents who do this at 8am on a bleak Saturday morning.
A well-dressed Dad hops out of his lovely car and says to his son, “Did you bring your jacket mate?”
Of course, the 10 year old boy said, “No.”
Dad said in a matt…
A couple of weeks ago, I was travelling down south for work (and a little pleasure) so I listened to a few podcasts. I have a love for true crime .... I can't listen to high-brow stuff all the time. Randomly, at the end of Australian True Crime, an astrologer came on and what she had to say was fascinating.
She said that Astrologers had been predicting the turmoil of 2020 for some time. The last time certain planets were in alignment was at the start of the industrial revolution - where life a…
Every Sunday I share a newsletter with my list and amongst other things I share some of the coaching conversations that I have had. It seems that many of the themes are universal so I am going to share those conversations here.
Questioning Assumptions and Back to Basics
I was coaching a Head of Learning Area in a secondary school this week and she described 3 staff with very different personalities and how they were challenging her. Lots of ah-ha moments were shared in this coaching session. T…
Every creature on earth has a purpose – even flies, which are annoying and can ruin a good picnic.
Feedback can be like that too.
We need feedback to grow and develop but boy-o-boy can it ruin your day!
We are getting feedback ALL THE TIME but mostly we don’t notice it.
If it doesn’t come in the language or currency we understand, we brush it off not even registering it as feedback. Batting it away like a pesky fly – barely giving it a thought.
Until that fly buzzes past again, and again u…
Hands up if you are busy and could do with another pair of hands??
I think we all could.
But here's the thing…
You can! Below are some options but I want you to notice what your internal dialogue is telling you when you read them...
- You can ask the people around you for help - your kids, your staff, your partner - and then keep them accountable.
- You can pay people
Curious to know what the voices in your head are saying right now???
Let's pretend you are in a leadership role in a schoo…
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